Blessed. That's all I can say...I am blessed. I woke up this morning with a weariness. But as my morning progressed...getting my kids ready for school, looking at the as-yet-to-be-repaired flooring, rushing them out the door, listening to their silly cute-as-heck conversations...God thwopped me again. YOU ARE BLESSED! YOU ARE MY CHILD! WORRY IS A SLAP IN MY FACE! DO NOT PRAY AND JOURNAL YOUR PRAYER CONCERNS TO ME AND THEN TAKE THEM BACK! I DIED FOR YOU. LIVE FOR ME! Its true. I am so guilty of this. Asking God to handle my worries, my concerns, then failing to trust Him enough to toss them away...to the depths of the ocean. I consistently feel the need to dive back into that water to retrieve them. Because they are my cares. They belong to me; with me. Right? Such a difficult lesson. But I'm trying very hard to see in myself what God sees. A beloved, worthy, beautiful child of...well...HIM.
I mean lets face it: I mess up enough in life with things that I have no control over.(don't we all?) Do I really need to add to my mess by holding onto worry too? No. No I do not.
So today marks yet another start of me trying...prayerfully not in vain this time...to let it go and let God. Because at the beginning and end of every day...I am blessed. Blessed beyond all measure.
I am blessed to be married to Jesse. After nearly 16 years of marriage...you come to realize that while it hasn't always been blissful, it has indeed always been blessed. What an honor to be his wife. I don't say that enough...out loud anyway. I need to do a better job of being worthy of him.
Kate...my sweet kooky and quirky Kate. My first baby...my first blessing. What a joy this young woman is! I need to do a better job of relating to her as the teenager she is. Sometimes I forget that she isn't 30:) Thank you God for this amazing daughter who is turning into an equally amazing friend.
Emmy Jean...my Broadway bound beauty! There is quite honestly never a dull...or quiet...moment with her. Whether having an intelligent conversation, doing homework, reading a book, watching tv, or drying her hair...this kid is constantly singing or humming! Its hilarious! I need to do a better job of busting her out of this "middle child" pigeon-hold. She is a force to be reckoned with! And I thank God for every single music filled moment with her.
Jax. Just Jax. Those who know him...love him. Those who don't...have heard wild tale of him! He is my miracle baby. He is quite literally a gift from God...his life marks a huge spiritual awakening for me. I couldn't love this kid more if I had to...at least until tomorrow:)
And these are just the blessings inside the walls of my home! I have so many more God-given gifts in the form of friends and family. I am convicted today of neglecting to tell each of them more often how very much I love them.
God has directed me to neither worry nor fear. So that is precisely what I will try my very best to do. Because the blessings that He has seen fit to give me...show me I am a favored child. His child.
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